Some Bits of This and That

Source: Oxford Leader

June 28, 2006 - Notes from the war front. My battle with the Scalopus Aquaticus (the common Eastern Mole) has taken a decidedly dicey turn. I have taken to walking in my yard, near the veggie garden, barefooted. When I feel the hard, clay earth beneath me give, I smash my heel in as far as I can. I follow along the length of the enemy's underground bunker, smashing and cursing as I go.

Reader Dave Kugler, of Ortonville and president of Critter Catchers, Inc., wrote me this weekend.

Said he, "Stomp away! You will feel better, if nothing else. To solve the problem, you have to turn your attention to the mole, not the hole. (Nice, Mr. Kugler, Fran and Ollie -- rhyme away at my time of need, thanks buddy.)

"Moles are accustomed to having their tunnels destroyed, and it does not change their behavior. It is a mere inconvenience."

Dave, as he so aptly put it, watches holes, not moles. For $129 he'll come out, inspect the site and take the war to a whole new, high-tech level. He'll whack 'em and stack 'em for $75 a head.

If you have a war going on in your yard, I guess you can consider Dave your personal mole mercenary. Call in the cavalry at 248-432-2712.

 - Don Rush

The article appeared in the Oxford Leader.